Yes, I'm in Miami. Yeah yeah yeah, I don't want to hear about how nice it must be. I'm in a much fouler mood than usual while sitting down to hammer out a message to the Intertubes. I may be burning out more than usual today. You are warned, dear Reader.
I'm sure it must be nice in Miami as well, I'll have to ask someone else about it though, since all I've seen was the airport, the freeway through the cab windows and the inside of a windowless ballroom (which, for the record, looks like EVERY ballroom I've ever been in, only colder) - but it's still impossible to tell people that I'm working in Miami and maintain anything resembling a conversation about it, they look at me like I'm crazy or like a kid complaining about Xmas.
No, as usual, the fall is crazy time around the job. And as usual it makes everything a giant blur of airports, anonymous hotel rooms, even more anonymous conference rooms.
Nice as some of the destinations sound I'd much rather be home with the family. I don't know how to stress that enough. Maybe "I don't want to be anywhere BUT home with my family" or "I never want another day that doesn't have my kids in it" but those both sound extreme.
I would just like to be much nearer, much more.
My wife reminds me all the time (and I try to remind myself) that the thing that sticks out in the boys' memory will be that their dad loves them and wants them to be happy. It most likely will not be that their dad went on trips all the time - and if our plan to help them be little world travelers works out they might even think it was odd if I didn't.
That helps a bit, if I thought it was getting to them I'd have a much harder time than I already do being away from the little guys. I might not be able to do it at all. But knowing that doesn't do much for the fact that I can see them growing up in leaps and bounds and every time I'm away I'm aware of all the tiny things I'm missing. First days of school, fevers, meeting girls they "love", doing homework and all the rest of it. Your kids shouldn't age before your eyes - because you're supposed to see them so much you don't notice. I notice.
I don't care where work takes me, I wouldn't trade any number of days on any beach for a day around the house with my little boys while they're still little. So yes, I'm in Miami. I can even see the ocean from my balcony. That doesn't mean anything next to the two little things I can't see anywhere in this place.
1 comment:
Yes.
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